the Life, the Times, the Thoughts....

DC Race Relations Examiner: The veil: peering into the shadows of Mr. Jefferson's university

2009-04-14T16:23:00.001-04:00

DC Race Relations Examiner: The veil: peering into the shadows of Mr. Jefferson's university

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Fear.

2009-02-26T10:17:00.002-05:00

By mastering that which we fear, we tend to organize domination of those who are in fear.

COKE = SIMPLICITY

2009-02-21T19:44:00.002-05:00

In an economy where one man’s trash is another man’s treasure, the idea of living simply is enticing. This blog post finds its inspiration from some friends who were looking for treasure one day… nevertheless, I placed my own spin on this topic.

Living simply is one of those those words like: reconciliation, community, and contextualization…. which have become a part of our christianese. They are buzz words in the Christian community that make our eyes perk up when you say them, but no one actually knows what it means. Well, when I saw Lynn and Kathy going through Divinity school recycling one afternoon, I couldn’t stop but to ask, “what are you doing?” And they politely answered, looking for cokes. In my mind, I thought, “if you were thirsty, why didn’t you say so.” But as we stood there, they made it clear that they were looking for cash. I will say that I don't know what they were spending their coke dollars on.

Coke Rewards = Simplicity. For those of you who aren't familiar, the tops of coke products are worth a certain number of points. The more points you accumulate, the more stuff you are able to purchase. Who thought that drinking more soda would be living simply. And even digging through the lost trash of the divinity school could be treasures that pay for weddings, furniture, gift cards, and more coke! Crazy.

Yet, can we claim this new era of coke to be living simply? I’ve always associated living simply with the Monastic Movement, and when I look back at the Desert Father’s and monastic’s of old and present, I find that their experience of simple living had to do with relinquishing their own desires in order to be more focused on God. And where living simply is a way to live with only that which is necessary to survive. I wonder if Gandhi, Mother Teresa, or St. Francis could get away with finding their purchasing power in coke tops?

I’m of the opinion that by buying into coke money we still participate in the oppression of others and satisfy our own desires. Just because you don’t spend your money on it… doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re living simply. By using coke rewards to purchase polo shirts… you’re still contributing to the poor working conditions and employees earning less than minimum wage. By buying tickets to Disney World, we’re kind of stamping the world with your very special God-given carbon finger print. But coke has something, thankfully, you can always donate your coke cash to charity and save the world.

Forgive me, I’m also skeptical of simplicity because in many ways simplicity is relative. For you, it might mean white picket fence and two car garage, and for others it might mean selling all your possessions and living with only necessities. And it may just mean dumpster diving or collecting coke tops to pay for amenities and perks that we can’t afford or don’t want to spend money on. As we move forward in this era of simple living, may we begin to think long and hard of what simplicity means to us and how we want to live that out in the world. For if calling our lives simple stops with coke tops, then Living Simply just means meeting our own selfish desires in ways that are less “normal” and more “natural.”

2009-02-09T08:43:00.001-05:00

Making A Comeback.

2009-02-08T00:14:00.001-05:00

I realize that blogging is one of the only things that calm me. A step back from reality and a step forward into possibility.

I'm committing to blog more often. Lord, willing, once a week. More if possible.

Charlene

Racial Reconciliation

2009-02-07T23:54:00.005-05:00

Sometimes I get really sick of hearing white folks be the "end all, be all" when it comes to reconciliation. There's alot that is hidden in that statement, power dynamics, race, discourses around sexism, and America. The list goes on. BUT when will white folks begin to listen. Obviously, I'm a bit frustrated. You spend 30 minutes talking to a white person, and all of a sudden they are a "specialist" on the black experience. I don't think it is possible... and I don't think it will ever be possible for the white person to know what a black person actually experiences in his/her day to day activities. I believe that God is reconciling all things, but it won't happen till there is some confession-- on both sides in different ways.

Has Racial Reconciliation just become a buzzword. Has Social Justice become a fad?

Stop and Listen. Stop and See. Stop and Feel. Let me tell my story.

Very frustrated one night... I wrote ferociously, trying to capture the feeling in the pit of my stomach. This is what I came up with... a verse around a conversation I had.

discourse around race / systems of oppression / systems of depression / conceives death / without resurrection / fully thought / Phil 2 / have you had you humble pie / he's not mexican, he's cuban / he's not your project / he's a black man / her ear is the Lord's / his mind is too / her eyes are to see / that your conception is wack / one day He'll tear down a wall / but today, just stop throwing rocks at my people. (c)

Moving On...

2008-11-28T16:28:00.001-05:00

After alot of thinking and conversations, I actually will no longer be feeding my blog through facebook.

If you would like to check it out from here on out...

visit: cbrown08.blogspot.com.

Keep Up...

2008-11-17T09:10:00.004-05:00

Sooo... since school started this semester, I haven't been able to keep up. But I will... I'm making a commitment to my audience to publish a post once a week. Y'all want it, so I'll give it to you.

Look out for the post... Tuesdays Nights.

Much Love.
Charlene

AND... my blog gets imported to facebook, (that might change), but if you want to see the photos or clips i put up, it would behoove you to check out my original site:

www.cbrown08.blogspot.com

Maya Angelou, "Still I Rise, that's what American's do"

2008-11-09T09:30:00.000-05:00

What the Future May Hold...

2008-11-05T01:02:00.004-05:00

Wow, what a night, and what a historic day in history for everyone, not just black people or minorities, I think for EVERYONE.

This has been one of the hardest elections to watch. Not the campaigning, but rather the body of Christ. The division that exists within the body rests so deep in the hearts of men/people of God (like that inclusive langauge?). I have never seen this much confusion, slander, and hypocrisy in my life. The right against the left, the back biting and defamation... wow.

I believe in the soverignty of God, and all of my hope is in Him, that God will do whatever He wants to do. Who am I to think that I have the power to swing a vote or state.... anyways, enough about that.

I've seen and heard so many people and conversations that have made me sick. It seems that the body of Christ has been split down the middle in regards to race, gender, politics, etc, and these deep hurts are only more apparent in this time. Race continues to pull at who we are, this competition of who is chosen and who is not, is causing us. Some folks, are still at unrest... and I don't know what to say. I hope that this election helps to bring people closer together than to split our nation down the center.

I don't claim to know anything or to have it all right, but I know what I see and it worries me. Is anything too hard for God? No. Is God's arm too short to intervene? No.

I pray peace and blessings over our President Elect and VP, and I pray that God would give him wisdom as he leads us. What else can I say.

We're on the brink of a deep deep reconciliation here, and I believe that we can. I believe that God can.

"I'll stand with arms high and heart abandoned."

Obama '08.

The Time Is Now...

2008-11-04T23:01:00.001-05:00

A few seconds ago, Barack Obama was projected to be the next President of the United States....

It's Been A Long, Long, Long Time Coming

2008-11-04T22:57:00.002-05:00

I haven't blogged in a while.... so here it goes, on the eve of this great election, I return, this is the beginning of something great.

New Chapter....

2008-08-13T23:08:00.002-04:00

Starting this week, I'll start blogging about my journey(s) at Duke Divinity and the Iredell House, where I'm living, (an intentional community of christians.... stay tuned to find out what that means).

We're in for a bit of a ride, buckle up and take a road trip with me.

If you would like to send fan mail, lol, drop by, or just say hello, the address is as follows:
1116 Iredell Street
Durham, NC 27705

And I'll Forever Chasing After You

2008-05-04T15:52:00.001-04:00

Each and every day I will seek Your face.
My soul is crying out for more, I want more of You.
I won’t be satisfied nor content with where I am.
So I will apprehend till I’m captured by what I’m after.

I will go from faith to faith, from glory to glory.

And I’ll forever be chasing after You.
I’ll be chasing after You.

I will press toward the mark for the prize, and I won’t faint.
There’s one things I desire and that’s what I’m going for.
I can’t continue life day by day growing dry
I need to be with You, Jesus, I seek where You are.

I will go from faith to faith, from glory to glory.

And I’ll forever be chasing after You.
I’ll be chasing after You.

I will go from faith to faith, from glory to glory.
And I’ll forever be chasing after You.

A Look Back At MLK on Meet the Press

2008-04-23T11:09:00.000-04:00

We Remember VA Tech.....

2008-04-15T21:33:00.001-04:00

The Legacy of Dr. King.

2008-04-04T08:13:00.004-04:00

(Exiled by Hurricane Katrina)
"One hundred years later, the Negro is still languished in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land." — Martin Luther King Jr., from “I Have a Dream”

Injustices still stare us in the face today, whether that's here on the campus of UVA or simply living in the United States of America.

Today, we honor Dr. King's ministry of reconciliation today and his efforts to bridge the gap between God's people. In this ministry of reconciliation we hope to move past the issue of protest and boycott and into redemption. In these last 40 years, to some extent, we've been in the same place that we've been since Dr. King. And although there's been progress, there has also been regression. In the ministry of reconciliation, I believe that we all have a responsibility. A responsibility to our fellow peers and humans.

The Heart of Worship is Surrender

2008-03-26T09:53:00.005-04:00

cbrown08.blogspot.com

Give yourselves to God.... Surrender your whole being to him to be used for righteous purposes. -Romans 6:13 TEV

Since we started leading "Chosen" last week, God is continuing to make clear to me that he desires a Holy Standard among his people. And what caught me when I read the verse above, is that whatever we surrender to... we worship. When we surrender to sin, in essence, we worship that sin, we give of ourselves unrestrained to that temptation, and we say use me for ignoble purposes.

However, when we flee from sin, we surrender ourselves to God, and say Lord, I believe that you have a greater purpose for my life, a life beyond mediocrity. I believe that you have called me for a divine purpose, a purpose greater than I can imagine.

Maybe the issue is that we think God cannot use us for his divine purpose.

Maybe something deep within us believes that God is withholding every good and perfect thing from us.

Maybe we don't believe that we are worth it.

And even maybe, we don't believe that God is loving and merciful because of our life's experience and hurt.

But I truly believe that "we are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that we may declare the praises of him who called us out of darkness and into the wonderful light." -1 Peter 2:9

Trust is essential to surrender, and we can't surrender to God unless we trust him.... but you can't trust him until you know him better. Perfect love casts out all fear... the more you realize how much God loves you, the easier surrender becomes.

If you're interested or wondering how this could be so, how you can know Him better, how you can surrender to God, and accept that he has called you, chosen you, and says you belong to Him, I urge you to come out to

CHOSEN 8pm Sunday Nights Clark 101.

Who Are You?

2008-03-20T12:39:00.005-04:00

CHOSEN

Are You Just A Facebook Christian?
Is Jesus Just Your Homeboy?
Is That Enough?

What does it mean to be CHOSEN of the God?
Bring your thoughts, questions, and a friend…

Join Us on Sunday Nights @ 8pm in Clark 101

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. […] So too, at the present time there is a remnant chosen by grace.” -1 Peter 2:9 & Romans 11:5

"Secular"

2007-12-30T12:19:00.001-05:00

sec·u·lar /ˈsɛkyələr/
–adjective
1. of or pertaining to worldly things or to things that are not regarded as religious, spiritual, or sacred; temporal: secular interests.
2. a place without God or religion
3. a state of being separate from God

Bless the Lord Oh My Soul

2007-12-30T11:45:00.001-05:00

Bless the Lord Oh My Soul

Son of Man, Son of Righteousness,

King of the Earth for sinners slain.

I was lost, in darkness bound.

You answered my call and I will sing

You are...

My Strength, My Deliverance

The One who rescued me

My Hope, My Redeemer

Your love has set me free

Bless the Lord, Oh my soul

Nobody like You!

And the splendor of Your Majesty from deep within my spirit sings, "Holy, Holy"

weird....

2007-12-14T02:35:00.003-05:00

Weird, I hear that alot.... so let's get some definitions.

weird (wîrd)

adj. weird·er, weird·est
1. Of, relating to, or suggestive of the preternatural or supernatural.
2. Of a strikingly odd or unusual character; strange.
3. Archaic Of or relating to fate or the Fates.

n. weird
1. Fate; destiny.
2. One's assigned lot or fortune, especially when evil.
often Weird Greek & Roman Mythology One of the Fates.

tr. & intr.v. weird·ed, weird·ing, weirds

Slang To experience or cause to experience an odd, unusual, and sometimes uneasy sensation. Often used with out.

It's hard when you think you should fit, but you don't. It's hard when you feel like an odd in every situation. You know you are called, but at the same time you feel alienated. You spend most of your time encouraging others, only to realize that at the end of the day, you are the one who needs encouragement. You want to stick it out, and give all you've got, but at the same time, you're tired, exhausted, and ready to give in. You realize that you've fallen short in more ways than one. For a second, the past looks more worth it than the future. But to give up means to forsake the future, to say "God, I don't think your able to provide, to love me, to keep me." I take pleasure in knowing that God has set us apart for a reason, that we are called to trust Him completely, and that "He takes pleasure in those that honour Him; in those who trust in His constant love" (Psalm 147:11).

Is He Beautiful to You

2007-09-29T20:43:00.002-04:00

Is he altogether wonderful to you?
Have we seemed to lose the beauty and awesomeoness of God?
When you encounter Him, do you stop and marvel?
Do you give Him your everything?
Would you stop and bow in reverence of a Holy God?
What is the one thing you seek?

Is it to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord, and inquire in His holy temple?

Is God beautiful to you?

Rediscover the Light of the World....

2007-08-20T00:07:00.001-04:00

God's hiddeness is not an invitation for lamenting or mourning. God's hiddeness calls for our action, an invitation that requires action. God's hiddeness is an invitation of how to listen and see differently so that we might see God now, even in his hiddeness. It is worth lamenting that we live in this advent (in between) time. God's hiddeness prompts us to action. We must take the moments of God's hiddeness as a time to rediscover God, learn to listen and look differently, that even when God is hidden, we may have an epiphany.

We are always in the Christian life being challenged to rediscover God. And even as God is sometimes hidden, we are challenged to share that discovery with the world. We are invited to discover and rediscover Immanuel. The God who though sometimes is hidden, the word calls Him, Emmanuel, because He is God with us.

Tye Tribett Live DVD Recording

2007-08-19T18:32:00.000-04:00

Blessed! Tye and GA were amazing!

Visit the blogsite to see it in full effect.

"I Need You"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFXvcvrpB-k&mode=related&search=&v3

....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtc8A3KkGYY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3tPJQur-CPY

MUSI208D: Music in Asian America

2007-08-07T14:15:00.001-04:00

One of the best summer classes I've ever taken. Here's a class where Brian Le came in and did some choreography. To learn more about Brian visit: http://www.ratednext.blogspot.com/

Also to see the video of our class learning choreography visit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qRvqwa6l9Q0

Now That's What I Call Worship 86

2007-08-03T20:09:00.000-04:00

check the actual blog if you can't see it. www.cbrown08.blogspot.com

There Won't Be A Next Time

2007-07-23T12:58:00.002-04:00

Yesterday, Sunday, July 22, 2007, I had the adventure of a lifetime. So I decided to share my adventures with the world for two main reasons. Reason 1: to give the you, the world, some laughs. Reason 2: to make you more aware of the kinds of things that go on in your neighborhoods, so that next time, you'll be more prepared.... read on.

I woke up and I decided to go visit a church that I'd heard of, plus I was familiar with the Pastor Sherman (his name has been changed to protect his identity), I had seen him around, and he seemed legit. Woke up, and got ready, ready to learn, just expectant. When I got there, there were maybe 10 people there. As humans, our first instincts are to say whoa, it's time for me to leave. SO I'm thinking to myself, this brother knows me, it would be wrong for me to walk in and walk out. So I sit down, 4th row from the front. And I guess I'm the first guest they had in a while, so he's preaching to me. Inside I'm like OK, we're closer to end, ain't nothing wrong with that.

After church, he comes over to say what's up and see how school and everything is going. He introduces me to his wife and kids, all cool people. Then he invites me to come to lunch with him and his family. He asks me to ride with him, I refuse saying I drove. So we're off to Woodgrill. Much fun, those kids are so rambunctious.

During the course of lunch, his spiritual brother gives him a ring and says that God has given him a word for the church. Giving the instructions to call up the members of the church (5 other people) and return to the hotel where the service is held. SO his spiritual brother drives up from Chester, VA. And the whole time, they're talking about how they had just returned from "Holy Convocation," which I guess is something like an Apostolic National Convention, apparently its huge.

Soo brother’s got a word! Pastor Sherman asks me to stick around and meet his spiritual brother. I said, I wouldn’t mind. Pastor Sherman has been wanting a relationship with impact, whether bible studies, fellowship, or just being available to help out, and this was one of the reasons I went to visit Sunday morning. So the logic was to meet the people that he’s connected to, because the people that you hang around say a lot about who you are. [You may want to stop, and take a few seconds to think about your social network].

I’ve been at church from 11:30 to 2:30, lunch, and then return from 4:30 till (I’ll fill you in at the end). For the first hour, Pastor Sherman and his 4 members are yelling “Hallelujah Bless ya.” Saying press into God and be obedient. So in my mind, I’m just thinking, “just because the worship is different, and praise and worship is a boom box, does not mean that I can’t get with it.” Spiritual brother comes in an hour late, 5:30 in a very starchy purple suit with the in style fat knot ties. In my head I think… “I hope his words are as crisp as his suit.”

He’s preaching from Deut 28, the passage on blessings and curses. And straight up from the start, I’m just wondering if this dude is legit. And I’m not trying to be judgmental; I just want to hear him out. 45 mins or so into it, he says pick up your wallet and yell… “BLESSED.” And I started laughing. I just couldn’t hold it in. He looks at me, and says “you, sister in the green, you don’t have enough faith. I said pick up your wallet and yell blessed.” So I picked up my wallet and mumbled “blessed.” Then he says “The Lord wants to know if you really want, you have to believe, you need to have faith. So I nonchalantly said “blessed.” He starts rambling on names of banks as the sermon now becomes caller response:

Prophet/Spiritual Brother yells: Bank of America
Congregation yells: Blessed
P: Navy Federal
C: Blessed
P: Wachovia
C: Blessed

Every local and national bank you could think of, he said. Probably took about 5 minutes.

Mind you, I’m sitting there staring at this cat as if he was crazy. But let me put this more in context. I was the only female wearing pant… (my bad, some people advise to wear skirts just to be safe, and not offend anyone in the church), but I frankly, don’t really care. Also, all the women had on these little bonnets right on top of the middle of their heads. Not a hat, just a round piece of a cloth… looked like a cloth coaster to me. So already…. I’m the unsaved college kid. Muahaha.

Prophet then calls for a “file single line,” my interpretation was a “single file line.” I kind of sat there as everyone rushed to receive their word. He looks at me and then declares that I am being disobedient. Man… I didn’t want to be disrespectful and just leave, there were 10 people in there, and folks at the door. It was just sad and pathetic. SO to combat my disobedience, I got up to the filed single line.

And he’s laying hands on people, doing his thing. Here’s a transcript of out conversation. Prophet: He gets to me and tells me “the Lord is saying that you are not saved.”
Charlene: I laugh… in his face and say “actually I am.”
P: “How do you know?”
C: “I’ve prayed the prayer of salvation, accepted Christ in my heart, and have chosen to live for God.”
P: “That’s not enough”
C: “o… really” as a matter of factly
P: “Have you been baptized in the name of Jesus”
C: I was kind of dumbfounded, because from my history of learning about the Apostolic church I know that they do not believe in the trinity, and baptize in the name of Jesus only. I’ve never actually seen anyone argue with a “prophet,” especially if it’s not your home church. And mind you, everyone thinks he’s the biggest thing since the Big Steak Omelet at iHop. So, after a quick silence, and thoughts running rampant in my head, “I say yes.”
P: “Have you been baptized in the Holy Spirit? And do you speak in tongues.”
C: I just proceed to give him this look, like why are you trying so hard.
P: He starts to prophecy, “we you need to let go of your anger and frustration so that you can be saved for real. I see spirits all around you holding you back from your blessing.”

As he is prophesying, his amour bearer comes from behind and picks me up. Six-Four, 250 pounds, he’s huge. And the Pastor is yelling, we must baptize her. Apparently, I didn’t know what I was talking about because the spirits had clouded my memory and reality.

C: So I’m yelling, “Put me down, I’m saved, I’ve already been baptized.
P: Calls the church mothers and elders to surround me and pray for obedience
C: I’m laughing, and thinking, what foolishness! I know that I’m saved.
P: They start laying hands. The amour bearer proceeds to start walking to the pool outside of the hotel so that they can baptize me. Prophets summons someone to “go get clothes so that she can change after we baptize her.”
C: I’m thinking 1) If these ninja’s put me in the water, I’m suing someone. 2) I just flat ironed my hair. 3) What did I get myself into? 4) Where is the hotel staff? 5) Who the baptizes in a pool, where others are currently swimming? 6) The whole time, I’m just praying that God would shield me from this obviously not so godly mess.

After much fighting, he puts me down, and again declares my disobedience. Prophet asks me to go sit down. So I do, while looking to make an exit. It’s about 7:45, and I’m wondering why the heck I stayed that long. I’d never been in a situation like that nor did I know if it was okay to get up and leave or if it would be rude. Something just wasn’t right.

A few suggestions:
1) NEVER go church hopping alone. It’s not safe! Always take a friend. We don’t let friends drive drunk, or walk alone at night, don’t let them visit churches alone.
2) If you get a feeling that something is not right, and you know that it is more than your nerves, go with your gut instinct.
3) Be careful who you let lay hands on you.
4) If need be… call the police. Hahaha, not really.

The Art of the Philly

2007-07-02T08:58:00.001-04:00

Enjoy!

teachme -Musiq Soulchild

2007-07-01T17:20:00.001-04:00

No Greater Love...

2007-06-22T19:29:00.001-04:00

To me there is no greater love.....

Question...

2007-06-18T22:35:00.001-04:00

Has the Gospel constrained you to be a worshipper for the rest of your life?

Im'll Buy You a Drank...

2007-06-14T09:04:00.002-04:00

So my Facebook status has been, "Charlene is thinking.... I don't want you to buy me a drink, I want to know if your credit is good enough to buy me a house. And because I've had so many co-signers and ladies to affirm the status, I thought we should dig a little deeper... lol. My friends have heard my reasoning.

So this new hit song, every man wants to buy a lady a "drank." Now lets put this into perspective. So... your at a club. Let's put a name on it, "Club Gitsome." Aight, and for my ladies, a young fine looking brother approaches you. He's sporting some nice attire, shows you his key ring, and my yes, it has a Lexus key chain. He's got on the Gucci glasses and yes, his fade is tight and fresh. He approaches you with a tinysmirk, and as he gets closer, he looks even better. He orders you a drink, and take it... it's your favorite, he's ordered a Mojito . He's got you all figured out.

Nice car [that you haven't even see with your own eyes, for all you know, he borrowed his dad's car to get it detailed the next day, or like most of our players for the night... it's a rental], nice clothes, nice glasses, nice clean fade, and he has all 32 of his teeth: no more no less.

So after this drink, here comes the infamous rush of lust. Do you proceed or say thank you, and call it a night. For some, a $7 drink is enough for a night of lust and heartbreak and a rollercoaster of emotions.

Now, lets rewind and set up a different scenario. The young man approaches, says good evening. Purchases a Mojito for you, and then proceeds to take out the deed for his $750,000 summer house. He asks your name, and proceeds to sign the house over to you. Look at that, you just acquired $750,007 in one night. In no way am I implying "gold-digger status," nor am I implying that $750,007 is enough for a night of lust, emotion, and maybe even a child.

Let me clarify my position before I hear about myself. I feel that a fire outside the confines of a fireplace, and in the middle of a living room floor is dangerous... and probably will burn down the house. And sex outside of the confines of marriage, is like that too. It's not that sex is bad, but outside of marriage and covenant, there's an unexpressed need for responsibility, there is confusion, and emotional ties, as well as leading to discontent, sexual compromise, self-loathing, and emotional brokenness.

I just wanted to share the thoughts that were going through my mind as I thought about the song....

Tip For the Ladies: Guard Your Heart.

Am I A Racist?

2007-06-07T00:29:00.001-04:00

So, today, I was getting my mid-day fix of Oprah. The show was talking about racism and discrimination. Everything from black white, the Holocaust, to White Supremacists and Homosexuals. visit http://www.oprah.com/.

Anyways, the point of this blog, is because there were some researchers on Oprah that had made a test to determine how our subconscious minds interpret race. Well, a couple of hours later, I visited the site. Sorry, but the site only deals with black and white, and it determines if you have a preference to one race. I turned out fine. I'm with 6% of those who have taken the test, I have a slight preference to African-Americans. Nothing wrong with that???

Anyways, see for yourself: http://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/index.html

Interested?

2007-05-22T22:47:00.000-04:00

I'm putting together a collection of writings, poetry, songs, whatever it is that you would like to submit. The idea is to put together a collection of stories and/or art of an instance where God became real to you. The prompt is open to your own interpretation. I'm hoping to get a collection put together and published and would love to get stories from whomever wants to submit. A great opportunity to show your talent.

All I ask is:
A) you be audible. In this case readable....
B) Be Real
C) Christ Centered

The proposed collection title is "Then I'll Know."

Why? One of the reasons I've had this on my heart is because of the lack of transparency in our society. I think that one of the reasons I knew that my growth was possible, is because people showed me that the same God that brought them through, is able to bring me through. There's something special and encouraging about reading or hearing a real-life story that you can connect with in a different way. It increases your faith, and gives you something to stand on.

Purpose: The purpose is not for people to look this collection and judge or merely ignore the wounds that we suffer. The purpose is show our friends, our families, our society, that God is more than able. Revelation 12:11 says that "they overcame by the word of thier testimony," and I believe that this is a start. Please don't judge your testimony with that of others, because yours is unique and special... because that's the way God wanted it.

Let me know if you're interested.

Here's an excerpt entitled: "My Drug Habit."
http://cbrown08.blogspot.com/2007/05/my-drug-habit.html

Phenomenal....

2007-05-22T21:43:00.001-04:00

Last week, May 13-18, Impact Leadership was extremely blessed to be able to go to Rockbridge Camp with InterVarsity. And might I add, what we were about to embark on, we had noooo idea or an inkling of the week to come. All we knew was that we had 6 days....

But let me start by saying it was absolutely phenomenal!!! I don't think I can fully paint the picture on paper for you, it doesn't do the week justice. The journey we embarked on amazed us all, from start to finish.

When we got there, I will admit, it was a little overwhelming, so much, so fast, so different. And mind you we did not know what to expect. Dinner... phenomenal... family style dining. Who woulda thought that that would have made that much of a difference in the way we interacted with one another. It causes you to serve your team... no doubt.

The times that I was able to spend with the lead team was far more amazing than I could have ever thought. Even though I didn't know what to expect, I was trusting the Lord to see us through, and order our steps and time with each other. He met us right were we were.

There's something special about being in a place, with a purpose, away from all the noise and hustle of the world. A place where there is no Internet, no cell phone service, no modern day technology. All we had was the Lord, a rock wall, some cool outside activities, bibles, each other, spades, milkshakes, Multi-Ethnic Worship, lol, and a Wal-Mart 30 minutes away. LOL.

Planning for the upcoming year went smoothly. I won't say that there weren't any speed bumps, but that brought us closer together. We prayed for one another, prayed for the ministry, and just sought God's face in a way that we should have been.

All that to say, God broke us off a piece of the Kingdom. I'm feeling God.

Fifth Grade...

2007-05-09T21:32:00.000-04:00

[Guys, girls, everyone: this is an excerpt from "Then I'll Know." Please don't call me and wonder if it's me or if you know the person. Don't be so quick to assume, just read it, let it simmer. And when it gets done, you can buy a copy for your library.]

When I was in fifth grade I was molested by my teacher. Up until that point, she was my favorite teacher of all time. I even got to meet her whole family. The day it happened, I didn't know who to tell, and I was afraid that if I did tell someone they wouldn't believe me. So for 10 years, I've carried this gigantic secret. And with that secret came a lie, of not being worth it. I spent my time wondering why and wishing that somehow I could ignore or forget it.

All I wanted was someone to love me. All I wanted was someone to say that I was special. All I wanted was someone to say that I was unique. Ever since I could remember, I've searched for the affirmation of the world. I've searched for something greater than this.

They say I'm a searcher, it's just who I am. I've looked for affirmation in my grades, in sports, in friendships, in my clubs and extracurriculars. But nothing quite fits. It's all momentary. It's happiness that lasts a second. Then I realize the other stuff going on in my life, and how I'm really not all I'm cut out to be.

But I masquerade around wearing an impostor. When it's him and not me, I feel as though I can conquer the world. This is the me that is cynical, rude, and sarcastic. The one that talks down to other people, so that I can feel better about myself. The one that acts as though he is bothered by nothing. He is indifferent. And somehow in the midst of building my confidence in the impostor, I've lost me...

I've heard people talk of their experiences, but somehow, I see this picture of myself... irredeemable. Too broken for God to fix. Too low for God to pick up. Too ignorant of God and His ways to realize that He's the only one who is able to heal.

If only God would show me that He's able to take someone like me and change me, then I'll know, then I'll know.

Excerpt from my soon to be: "Then I'll Know."
Inspired by real people with real testimonies.

Persuaded...

2007-05-09T09:38:00.003-04:00

'The Incredulity of St.Thomas' by Caravaggio ca.1601, at the Neues Palais, Potsdam

The first time I saw this picture was in the IV office. And I couldn't stop looking at it. I love this picture, because it's sooo intense. The title is everything here. 'Incredulity' means an unwillingness to believe. Well, talk about persuasion. Phenomenal. The last Impact we talked about Joshua and the people crossing over the Jordan, and how God asked them to make memorials so that they could look back on their lives and see exactly where the Lord had brought them from and so that it could serve as evidence of His hand of protection over them. My challenge to you... take a couple of minutes today, sit in silence, and just ask that the Lord would speak to you. And then wait on Him. Spend some time meditating on His word. And then when your done, thank Him for those moments. The song in my heart: "I am persuaded / Lord to love You / I have been changed to bless Your name / I am constained by this gospel / forever to worship You.'

Humanity

2007-05-09T09:35:00.001-04:00

In the beginning, God created us “in his image.” So first, God gave us an image to bear. Then God gave us gender: male and female. Then God gave us something to do, to take care of the world and move it forward, taking part in the ongoing creation of the world. Later, people began moving to different places. It takes years and years of human history to get to the place where these people are from here and those people are from there. Different locations, skin colors, languages, and cultures, come much later in the human story.

What we often do is reverse the creative process that God initiated. We start with different cultural backgrounds and skin colors and nationalities, and it’s only when we look past these things that we are able to get to what we have in common – that we are fellow image-bearers with the shared task of caring for God’s creation. We get it all backward. We see all of the differences first, and only later, maybe, do we begin to see the similarities. The new humanity is about seeing people as God sees them.

My First Anniversary

2007-05-08T01:18:00.000-04:00

June 30th marks a very special place in my heart. It's been one year! A first that I want to share with the world.

For those of you who know me, you know that there are only a few things that really make me happy. You may be included in that bunch, maybe/maybe not. But in that list includes... God!, talking about electronics, computers, missions, reading books that are not for class, kids, only to name a few.

Anyways, June 30th marks my first blog entry. cbrown08, also known as "the Life, the Times, the Thoughts of," started as a way to keep my friends and family engaged as I ventured off to do missions in South Africa last summer.

If you enjoyed reading these entries, and want to help me celebrate, please feel free to send a check to me, to help further support the mission of mobilization. LOL. I love you, I do. And really, if you've been touched by anything you've read or seen, please feel free to sow a seed.

And remember God is Love, [That's for Nat and Rev. Run!]
Charlene

The Lake

2007-05-08T00:54:00.000-04:00

I think I found my spot!!!

Today was a marvelous day. As you may have heard, I got tired of looking at my four walls today. Exam/Paper time can be really stressful. So I could a study break. Not to mention, Pastor Beard has been talking about Spiritual Disciplines. So I thought it would be the perfect time for some solitude. Just me and God on the Lake. Yessir! I spent the morning looking for fishing poles to no avail... man that sucked, I love to fish! Aight, well I grabbed some blankets, my journal, my bible, and some books.

Christ Greene Lake, yessir, what a sight to see. Giant piece of water. Dock, man made beach, grass, grills, benches. If only I had a boat, some hamburgers, and a swim suit... Then it would be on. So with no tools, I started working on my tan. [Why are you laughing?]

AMAZING. It's like a short version of a silent retreat. Just me and God. Sorting out some stuff, clarity on some other things, just a wonderful time. Plus... I'm sitting right smack dab in the middle of nature, it was sooooo beautiful.

My Drug Habit...

2007-05-08T00:11:00.001-04:00

I knew my drug habit would eventually catch up to me. And unfortunately I sit here tonight writing and confused... How do I tell my parents. My friends are going to be so disappointed. My teachers saw a promising future.

I missed my exam Monday morning, because I tried something really dumb. How do I explain this to my Sociology professor. He's already racist, I can see it in his eyes when he looks at us. I bet he thinks I'm here because of affirmative action. I haven't done well in the past because I didn't study, not because I'm black.

Man, my priorities are screwed. I'm a searcher, it's just who I am. I hate this, every time I get money, I run to the neighborhood pusher, so I can buy some rocks. I grab my razor and I start to chop, chop, chop... wishing that I could just chop off all this pain and baggage that I feel.

I've been hurt, I've been wounded, I can't see clearly. Who would have thought that someone so smart could be so stupid. Every time I think or look at my future, it seems as though my failure is imminent, my life flashes before my eyes.

My grandmother told me there was more to life than this. She used to tell me stories of how she was healed from cancer, how she didn't die in that fatal accident. Man, I've been a fool, to think that I could go on this far like this. I'm ashamed and I'm guilty. She used to sing that song... what is it called? [pause] Don't Pass Me By.

I wish I could hold back my tears, but I've fallen short, I can't get this right... If only someone could show me that God is real... then I'll know, then I'll know.

Excerpt from my soon to be: "Then I'll Know."
Inspired by real people with real testimonies.

God in the Old and New Testament

2007-04-25T09:59:00.000-04:00

Priscilla Shirer at IMPACT 2006.

"In Genesis he is the breath of life, In Exodus he's the Passover Lamb,
In Leviticus he is our high priest, In Numbers he's the fire by night,
In Deuteronomy he's Israel's Guide, In Joshua he's salvation choice,
In Judges he's the kinsman Redeemer, In Samuel he's the Trusted Prophet,
In Kings and Chronicles he's Sovereign, In Ezra he's our true and faithful Scribe,
In Nehemiah he's the Rebuilder of Walls, In Esther he is our Courage,
In Job he's our timeless redeemer, In Psalms he's Our Morning Song,
In Proverbs he's our Wisdom, In Ecclesiastes he's our time and Season,
In Song of Solomon he's the Lover's Dream, Isaiah he's our Prince of Peace,
In Jeremiah he's our Weeping Prophet, In Lamentation the cry for Israel,
In Ezekiel he's the call from Sin, In Daniel he's the stranger in the Fire,
In Hosea he's forever faithful, In Joel he's the spirits Power,
In Amos strong arms that carry, In Obadiah he's the lord our savior,
In Jonah the great missionary, In Micah the promise of peace,
In Nahum he's our strength and shield, In Habakkuk and Zephaniah he brings revival,
In Haggai he restores that which was lost, Zechariah he is our Fountain,
And in Malachi he is the son of Righteousness rising with Healing in His Wings.

AND THAT IS JUST THE OLD TESTAMENT! If you are excited about what the Old Testament teaches us. Then you listen to me, if you are excited about that the Old Testament is not even as good to us as the New Testament.

Because in Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, he is not just our God he is our Messiah!
In the spirit filled book of Acts He's the Raining Fire from Heaven.
In Romans He's the Grace of God.
In Corinthians He's the Power of Love.
In Galatians he's Freedom from the Curse of Sin.
In Ephesians He's our Glorious treasure.
In Phillipians He's the servant heart.
In Colossians He's God in the Trinity.
In Thessalonians he's our calling King.
In Timothy, Titus, and Philemon he's our mediator and our faithful Pastor.
In Hebrews He's the Everlasting Courage.
In James he's the one who can heal you when you're sick.
In 1st and 2nd Peter our faithful Shepard's.
In John and Jude he's the lover coming for his bride. . . .
And in Revelation . . . in the very end. . . when it's all over said and done. . .
He will be the first and the last! The beginning and the end! The Alpha and the Omega! The Keeper of all Creation! He is Everything you need. EVERYTHING! And a God that greatly moved Heaven and Earth to get to you!!"

Double Consciousness

2007-04-25T09:38:00.000-04:00

The term originated from an 1897 Atlantic Monthly article titled "Strivings of the Negro People" (later, this was republished and slightly edited under the title "Of Our Spiritual Strivings" in his collection of essays, The Souls of Black Folk). He spoke of “this sense of always looking at one’s self through the eyes of others, of measuring one’s soul by the tape of a world that looks on in amused contempt and pity”, and of a two-ness, of being "an American, a Negro; two warring ideals in one dark body, whose dogged strength alone keeps it from being torn asunder."

Du Bois explained: "The history of the American Negro is the history of this strife, -- this longing to attain self-conscious manhood, to merge his double self into a better and truer self. In this merging he wishes neither of the older selves to be lost. He does not wish to Africanize America, for America has too much to teach the world and Africa; he does not wish to bleach his Negro blood in a flood of white Americanism, for he believes that Negro blood has yet a message for the world. He simply wishes to make it possible for a man to be both a Negro and an American without being cursed and spit upon by his fellows, without losing the opportunity of self-development."

The concept of Du Boisian "double consciousness" has three manifestations. First, the power of white stereotypes on black life and thought (being forced into a context of misrepresentation of one's own people while also having the knowledge of reflexive truth). Second, the racism that excluded black Americans from the mainstream of society, being both American and not American. Finally, and most significantly, the internal conflict between being African and American simultaneously.

Double consciousness is an awareness of one's self as well as an awareness of how others perceive that person. The danger of double consciousness resides in conforming and or changing one's identity to that of how others perceive the person.

c/o Wikipedia

Letter to the Students and Administration of the University of Virginia

2007-04-18T00:00:00.000-04:00

Date: April 17, 2007

On behalf of 30,000 students, administrators, and our Virginia Tech community, I cannot begin to express our gratitude for the outpouring of sympathy, support, and compassion UVA has shown us in the past two days.

It is an understatement to say the aftermath of our losses has been emotionally trying for us. The realization of losing 32 valuable lives in our Virginia Tech family is something that we are trying desperately to recover from. But even in the most difficult day of Virginia Tech history, we have found strength-it is your university in particular that has sustained us, far beyond what you will ever know.

How do we thank you for your students and faculty gathered here today to memorialize our victims and to share in our sorrow. How do we thank you for the initiative and commitment your student government made towards finding 30,000 candles for our grieving campus so that our student leaders could focus on healing and comforting instead. How do we thank you for the hundreds of Hokies who saw your painted bridge, and were moved to tears? How do we thank you for the way your students instantly put aside our infamous rivalry to the point where the greatest measures of compassion from another institution have been from you?

Your aid has had such a profound impact upon our students. Please know what UVA is doing is being noticed, is making a difference, and is nothing short of extraordinary.

Thank you for being a testament to the best of collegiate student leadership-and to humanity in general. In what we have been calling the darkest night Virginia Tech has ever seen, you are one of our brightest lights. The strong alliance that has been formed between our school and yours is part of our foundation in moving forward.

From our hearts to yours, thank you for your noble efforts. May you also find solace and restoration as we grieve together as students and as a nation. In or out of times of need, Virginia Tech will stand beside you as fellow students, Virginians, and most importantly, as friends.

With gratitude,
Elizabeth Hart
Virginia Tech
Student Government Association
Director of Public Relations

Hope After Tragedy

2007-04-17T23:26:00.000-04:00

We are sad today, and we will be sad for quite a while. We are not moving on. We are embracing our mourning. We are Virginia Tech ...

-Nikki Giovanni

After the tragedies of the VA Tech Massacre, the deadliest shooting in US history, I feel as though it puts things more and more into perspective. Life is not promised. God is forever, but we are for a moment. God is He who was and is and is to come, and we are like blades of grass, only for a season. My heart and prayers go out to the families, friends, and administration of VA Tech. Today you are family. I can't express the rollercoaster of emotions that I have experienced in the last 48 hours. I've had friends lose friends, I've had friends lose brothers and sisters, and I've had friends lose parents. I'm overwhelmed by what I saw on our campus tonight. Our Amphitheatre was packed with supporters for our sister school, and it was phenomenal and heartwarming. Now is a time for healing!

Many of us here at UVA are confused, were anxious, we feel for our sister campus, and have been praying that in the midst of tragedy, that God's light will shine among you in a way like never before. My prayer is that the power of God will begin a transformation process as the healing begins. And that even amidst funerals, that people will come to know the Lord and the power of his resurrection. I urge you all to fear not, for God knows. God is more than able to heal, it may take time, but trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding. "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit" Psalm 34:18. Be encouraged. Now is the time to go and declare the word of God. The harvest is plentiful but the laborers are few. Use this moment to take the authority that God has already given you, and share the hope that you have.

The $1,000,000 Queston:

If you were to die today, how sure are you, on a scale of 1-10, that you would go to heaven.

Answer the question honestly. And if for any reason, you are not sure, and your answer is not 10 or 100%, shoot me an e-mail, and I'll let you know how you can be completely sure.

Aaron Shust - My Savior My God

From the album Anything Worth Saying

I am not skilled to understand
What God has willed, what God has planned
I only know at His right hand

Stands one who is my Savior

I take Him at His word and deed

Christ died to save me; this I read

And in my heart I find a need

Of Him to be my savior

That He would leave His place on high
And come for sinful man to die
You count it strange, so once did I
Before I knew my Savior

My Savior loves, My Savior lives

My Savior’s always there for me

My God: He was, my God: He is

My God is always gonna be

Yes, living, dying, let me bring

My strength, my solace from this spring;

That He who lives to be my King

Once died to be my Savior

Christian Community Development, a glimpse into my Spring Break

2007-03-11T16:26:00.000-04:00

Our focus over the last week and the Guiding Ministry Principles were 3 R's of Christitan Community Development. Those principlals being Relocation: Living Among teh People, Reconciliation: People to God & God to People, and Redistribution: Putting our lives, skills, educations, and resources to work to empower people in a community of need.

Here is an excerpt of an article taken from the Christian Community Development Association website (www.ccda.org) on what Christian Community Development really means and it's focus. If you have a few minutes, take a moment to skim and read through some of it. It's interesting, and I pray it blesses you.

The Eight Components of Christian Community Development

by Dr. Wayne L. Gordon

Nehemiah begins with lamenting over the city of Jerusalem . "Those back in the province are in great trouble and disgrace. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down and its gates have been burned with fire." Neh 1:3b. This describes the situation in parts of most American cities today. They have been neglected and allowed to deteriorate for almost forty years. The church of Jesus Christ has at best sat back and watched this happen yet in many areas has contributed to the problem. The words of Nehemiah, "great trouble and disgrace," ring true for us in the church today.

The question arises as to what the response as Christians will be to the troubles of the poor and the inner cities today. The desperate conditions that face the poor call for a revolution in the church's attempts at a solution. Through years of experience among the poor, many have come to see these desperate problems cannot be solved without strong commitment and risky actions on the part of ordinary Christians with heroic faith.

There are many philosophies to solve the problems, but most fall short of any lasting change. The most creative long-term solutions to the problems of the poor are coming from grass roots and church-based efforts. The solutions are coming from people who see themselves as the replacements, the agents, for Jesus here on earth, in their own neighborhoods and communities.

This philosophy is known as Christian Community Development, which is not a concept that was developed in a classroom, nor formulated by people foreign to the poor community. These are Biblical, practical principles evolved from years of living and working among the poor. John Perkins in Mississippi first developed this philosophy. John and Vera Mae Perkins moved back to their homeland of Mississippi from California in 1960 to help alleviate poverty and oppression. Through their work and ministry, Christian Community Development was conceived. Christian Community Development has a proven track record with over 600 models around the country making great progress in difficult communities.

Christian Community Development has eight essential components that have evolved over the last forty years. The first three are based on John Perkins' Three R's of community development: relocation, reconciliation and redistribution. (Perkins 1995, 21-22) The rest have been developed by many Christians working together to find ways to rebuild poor neighborhoods. The following is a brief description of the eight key components to Christian Community Development.

For a detailed list of the Eight Components visit: http://www.ccda.org/?p=9

Spring Break...

2007-03-10T11:05:00.000-05:00

This past week I had the most amazing Spring Break to date. As Sarah, one of the programmers were praying, she said, "while most of your peers are outside enjoying themselves in the world, the students here have chosen to delight themselves in the kingdom of God and social justice, because that what God desires."

One Pure and Holy Passion

2007-02-05T10:09:00.000-05:00

Give me one pure and holy passion,
Give me one magnificent obsession,
Give me one glorious ambition for my life
To know and follow hard after You

To know and follow hard after You,
To grow as Your disciple in Your Truth.
This world is empty, pale, and poor,
Compared to knowing You my Lord.
Lead me on, and I will run after You.

Lord, if You trust me , I will run after You!

-William Murphy III, One Pure and Holy Passion

Thank You

2007-02-04T18:13:00.000-05:00

I realize that I share my birthday with the biggest sporting event of the year. I just wanted to say thank you all for your blessings and thoughtful words.

Charlene

When Our Worship is Lost...

2007-01-13T22:40:00.000-05:00

We understand how storms are created. We map solar systems and transplant hearts. We measure the depths of our oceans and send signals to distant planets. We have studied systems and seen how they work.

But for some, the loss of mystery has led to the loss of majesty. The more we know, the less we believe. Strange, don't you think? Knowledge of the workings shouldn't negate wonder. Knowledge should stir wonder. Who has more reason to worship than the astronomer who has seen the stars? Than the surgeon who has held a heart? Than the oceanographer who has pondered the depths? The more we know, the more we should be amazed.

Ironically, the more we know, the less we worship. We are more impressed with our discovery of the light switch than the one who invented electricity. Rather than worship the Creator, we worship the creation (See Rom 1:25).

No wonder there is no wonder. We think we've figured it all out.

-Max Lucado, excerpt from "In the Grip of Grace" (32:1996)

Application....
Man, it's crazy how when we think we've figured everything out, we lose our focus, perspective, and the awe. We get bored. And just like our relationship with God, we don't focus on the Creator, we tend to focus on the his creation. I was on the phone with Rasool (UVa's Impact Coach) for our weekly phone appointment and he said, "make sure the Heart of God does not get lost in the growth of the mind." I was somewhat floored, because it's absolutely true. Everyone who knows me, knows that I love theology, and reading, and writing, and all that great stuff, but at the same time, we get overly fascinated with what we are given rather than the Giver. This may all seem a little abstract, but it clicked for me, so I thought I would share. Just think about it... are you more concerned about the things that God can give and do for you, or is your primary focus seeking Him, just because He is.

Word....

2006-12-22T20:25:00.000-05:00

"Life is a gift, and God didn't bless us with a gift to live our entire lives in sadness. Sadness will pass, and then it's time to get up. dry your eyes, re-boot and grab back your life. And when you do, by all means, live it.... to the fullest!" -Donald Lawrence

God has the power to deliver you from whatever you struggle with, from wherever you find yourself, from whatever your hiding from. Lean on Him because in your weakness, His strength is perfected. He's listening, why not talk to Him now?

You Are God Alone -Marvin Sapp

2006-12-22T19:55:00.000-05:00

You Are God Alone
-Marvin Sapp, 2003

Verse 1:
There’s no question of Your greatness,
no searching of Your power.
All the wonder of Your glory,
to You forty years is but one hour.
Your knowledge is all encompassing,
to Your wisdom there is no end;
for You alone are God,
You are God alone.

Verse 2:
Your mercy is everlasting,
Your truth is here always.
You are He who was and is, and is to come.
Who is He that can number you days,
You’ve flung the sun to burn in space,
and the night’s moon powers light from day;
You are God alone.

Chorus:
Now unto the King,
eternal, immortal, invisible,
the only wise God,
the only wise God;
You alone are God,
for You are God alone.

Vamp:
Be all glory and honor,
dominion, and power
forever and ever, amen.

Ending:
For You alone are God,
You are God alone

I just thought that I would post this song. Beyond the fact that I like it, I think it demonstrates God's sovereignty and might. But even bigger than that, the mere fact that His mercy is everlasting and His love for us will never cease. I know that you can't hear it, but just take some time to read and let the words minister to you.

Equipment by Edgar A. Guest

2006-12-18T21:58:00.000-05:00

EQUIPMENT

Figure it out for yourself, my child
You've all that the greatest of men have had,
Two arms, two hands, two legs, two eyes
And a brain to use if you would be wise.
With this equipment they all began,
So start from the top and say, "I can."

Look them over, the wise and great
They take their food from a common plate,
And similar knives and forks they use,
With similar laces they tie their shoes.
The world considers them brave and smart,
But you've all they had when they made their start.

You can triumph and come to skill,
You can be great if you only will.
You're well equipped for what fight you choose,
You have legs and arms and a brain to use,
And the man who has risen great deeds to do
Began his life with no more than you.

You are the handicap you must face,
You are the one who must choose your place,
You must say where you want to go,
How much you will study the truth to know.
God has equipped you for life, but He
Let’s you decide what you want to be.

Courage must come from the soul within,
The man must furnish the will to win.
So figure it out for yourself, my lad.
You were born with all that the great have had,
With your equipment they all began,
Get a hold of yourself and say: "I can."

--Edgar A. Guest recited by George Washington Carver in 1942

This is published for all those who have helped me along the way. I could write out everyone's names, but I won't. My prayer is that you all would continue to be the men and women that God has called you to be. I'm beggining to understand the importance of community and accountability. And for that I'm very grateful to the body of Christ. It really does take a village to raise a child.

Second Chronicles 15:7 says, "But you, be strong and do not let your hands be weak, for your work shall be rewarded!"

Take Me As I Am

2006-12-12T20:30:00.000-05:00

Its 5:46 in the morning; tossin and turnin; chest burnin; sermons in my head keep reoccurring; havin visions in my head of a kid cryin at the feet of the father for all the wrong things that he did; now im sweatin in my sheets, cant sleep; my mind keeps tellin me im 6 feet deep; dont remind me; even though im still alive i cant tell; the way im livin my life i feel im goin to hell; God, they tellin me i should accept you; that you had to leave the world cause the world left you; reason i cant change; like a mystery to me; so i make-believe there really is a heaven for a g; even though they say you loved the world so much you shed your blood; God, i feel im too messed up for love; they tell me come as i am; but i smell like smoke; my whole life is full of sin cause its all i know; the bible told me you died for my sins; if i believe in Christ to save me from the end; but im scared to ask you to save me; my heart so weable; ive got thoughts just full of hatred; hurt from people; i thought that first i had to clean up my life; now im here and i just gotta cling to the light; im ready to do it but, i pray you understand; my life is a mess, will you take me as i am

Will you take me as i am; i know the way im livin is wrong, but i cant change on my own tryin to make it alone; i wonder, how could u love me with my life so ugly; but you came down and died for me. Will you take me as i am; i know the way im livin is wrong, but i cant change on my own tryin to make it alone; i wonder, how could u love me with my life so ugly; but you came down and died for me. Will you take me as i am.

im still tryin to be the man my daddy never taught me to be; im grown up now, life aint what i thought it would be; i made many mistakes in my past i cant fix; now im starin at this crucifix, tatted on my wrist; is it true what they tellin me am i just crazy; did you bleed on the cross for my sins to save me; but why would you die for me; my whole life ive been workin for Satan while he fed lies to me; and now im hearin too much; tryin to get a true touch; about a love that can change me; im all screwed up; figured hell is what i deserve; but ur word says we all fall short; so i guess we all ought to burn; teach me i want to learn; how you can save a wretch like me before death says its my turn; i think i finally understand; no matter my past you'll still take me as i am.

Will you take me as i am; i know the way im livin is wrong, but i cant change on my own tryin to make it alone; i wonder, how could u love me with my life so ugly; but you came down and died for me. Will you take me as i am; i know the way im livin is wrong, but i cant change on my own tryin to make it alone; i wonder, how could u love me with my life so ugly; but you came down and died for me. Will you take me as i am.

i had a few last words to give; ive be tellin people the reason to live, the reason to die; united with the king of the sky; this life is passin us by, ive got no reason to lie; you'll never give the world enough; they'll hunger for more; there fickle there ways of nothin to settle the score; more security than the man who left you; or more love than the moms who kept you; He'll always except you; be everything your supposed to; let christ rule your heart mind body and soul because he chose you; and if the world dont know you; it dont matter, your God's child and he'll never disown you; your purpose on earth is far from worthless; thats why you glorify like your lifes been purchased; and it dont matter if the world dont see us; we still mean the world to jesus.

Will you take me as i am; i know the way im livin is wrong, but i cant change on my own tryin to make it alone; i wonder, how could u love me with my life so ugly; but you came down and died for me. Will you take me as i am; i know the way im livin is wrong, but i cant change on my own tryin to make it alone; i wonder, how could u love me with my life so ugly; but you came down and died for me. Will you take me as i am.

"Take Me As I Am" -Lecrae

Grace, It's To Be Shared.....

2006-12-12T02:14:00.000-05:00

"Grace comes free of charge to people who do not deserve it, and I am one of those people. I think back to who I was—resentful, wound tight with anger, a single hardened link in a long chain of ungrace learned from family and church. Now I am trying in my own small way to pipe the tune of grace. I do so because I know … that any pang of healing or forgiveness or goodness I have ever felt comes solely from the grace of God," Philip Yancey.

THE BIBLE EXPERIENCE

2006-12-10T18:00:00.000-05:00

The behind-the-scenes video of the making of The Bible Experience, a fully-dramatized and symphonic-orchestrated reading of the New Testament performed by an unprecedented ensemble of distinguished African-American celebrities such as Denzel Washington, Blair Underwood, Angela Bassett, Juanita Bynum, Shirley Caesar, Samuel L. Jackson, Cuba Gooding Jr., Kirk Franklin, T.D. Jakes, and many more. Visit www.zondervan.com/TheBibleExperience

Mixed Messages...

2006-12-09T22:24:00.000-05:00

Our walk should follow all our talk. You shouldn't say something and not follow through. I believe this is a mistake, that alot of communities, especially the Af-Am community fails to do. Follow through is key.

Anyways, I'm tired and a bit frustrated with some folk. But maybe I put this whole thing in a box, and I'm making it bigger than it is... maybe God is going to work some other way, through some other person, with some other thing.

Okay, maybe I'm just mad... this post'll be down in a day or two, once I come to a new place and understanding... learning to respond

The Five Love Languages

2006-12-07T22:38:00.000-05:00

For those out there who are wondering about me... and can't seem to figure me out, I hope this helps!

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Quality Time
with a secondary love language being
Words of Affirmation.

Complete set of results

Quality Time:		11
Words of Affirmation:		9
Acts of Service:		7
Receiving Gifts:		3
Physical Touch:		0

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

I think the book, "Five Love Languages" is so cool. And it really teaches you stuff about who you are, how you like to give love to others, and how you like to recieve love. And I mean, I know that I'm really not a touchy feely person, but I didn't know that it was like that. lol. I loves me some quality time. Anyways, take the test, and enjoy!

Simply Put...

2006-12-04T01:36:00.000-05:00

"I don't really need to tell someone their future
I don't really have to see the things that can't be seen
I don't need another hyped up church encounter,
or another clever New Year's theme
I'm not looking for another goose bump sermon,
or a word that leaves me passed out on the floor
my basic needs are really very simple,
to know you love me, you like me, and I am yours."

-Fred Hammond, "Simply Put"

When I heard this song, it gave me shivers. Isn't that all we want? The essence of God and to know that he loves us? And minus denominations and sects, is this not what the Gospel message teaches us? That God loves us so much that he gave his Son to die for us. That who so ever believes in Him, should not perish, but have eternal life.

And then on top of that to know that He not only died for our past sins, but our present, and future sins. Rob Bell says it best:

"There is nothing you could ever do to make God love you less,
There is nothing you could ever do to make God love you less,
There is nothing you could ever do,
There is nothing you could ever do,
Nothing,
Nothing."

What's holding you back from experiencing this unconditional love? This love so great that there is nothing you have done or possibly could do to make Him turn his back on you.

Our simple response is to acknowledge and accept this simple truth.

Get at me...

Riveting Rollercoaster Ends With a Bang

2006-11-02T21:32:00.000-05:00

First of all a shameless plug for this Friday.

IMPACT
Gilmer 130 @ 7pm, not 7:30pm
Speaker: Amey Adkins
God's got a word for you!

This week has been so interesting. God is doing something new, and the mere fact that I'm able to bear witness to this is amazing. He's opened doors and is continuing to turn faces back to Him. He's stripped us of all "extraness" in an attempt to return us back to the essence of who he is. I'm really learning what it means when God becomes your sustainer. He's the one that you must depend on if you plan to move further and seek his face on a more intimate level. But I tell you, I'm in awe everyday of his goodness, grace, and mercy. Yes, some will say I'm cliche, but I say I just really love serving Him and am passionate about what I do. Life and Death is not a game...

IMPACT Parent's Weekend Large Group

2006-10-15T01:30:00.000-04:00

What? Only the hypest weekend ever for Parents and alumni to come back to the University and reminisce of the good times and the growth that took place in an environment like that of the University of Virginia. [Don't knock the hustle, if you went to a school like UVA, you would claim it too!]

Impact always keeps it real!

IT"S GOIN DOWN!!!

IMPACT UVA's Parent's Weekend Large Group
Where: MAURY 209
When: Saturday, October 21, 2006 at 5pm

alumni are always welcome, parents are also always welcome.

~Perfect Praise Dance Ministries will be performing!!~

IMPACT2006

2006-09-30T11:42:00.000-04:00

"...Awake, sleeper and Arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." - Ephesians 5:14

It resonates within you. The feeling of being with 3,000 other African American college students, high school students, marketplace professionals and educators.

It changes you. As you sit under the teaching of some of the most dynamic Bible expositors on the planet.

It moves you. As you hear about God's work through others just like you on campuses around the nation, in the community and throughout the world.

The eighth National Conference of the Impact Movement, IMPACT 2006, will be held December 27, 2006 - January 1, 2007 at The Omni Hotel at The CNN Center in Atlanta, GA.

IMPACT seeks to mobilize and provide ministry training for mature high school students, college students, marketplace professionals, educators, those in vocational ministry, and anyone who desires to take their relationship with God to the next level.

Experience electrifying praise and worship, hear from gifted Bible teachers as they share uncompromising truth, and fellowship with thousands who look just like you, and are on fire for God! Five days is what's being asked of you. God wants to change your life, deepen your faith and show you you to influence those around you for Christ. Now's the time and Impact 2006 is the place! Don't Sleep On It!

Conferees are challenged through keynote messages given by gifted and passionate Bible teachers that include: Pastor Keith Battle, Priscilla Shirer, The Ambassador, James White, Jumaine Jones, and Eric Mason.

This year, the conference will feature incredible music by electrifiying and dynamic Contemporary Gospel artists Israel & New Breed, blazing Christian Hip Hop artist Da' T.R.U.T.H., FLAME, soul-rocking Gospel R&B artists Michelle Bonilla and J.R., plus members of Impact's very own 2006 music project, Infinit Impact, which includes 3 UVA Graduates!!!, who will keep the conference hyped in glorious praise and worship to God!

TO REGISTER, VISIT
WWW.IMPACTMOVEMENT.COM, and click on IMPACT2006

But for Eternity

2006-09-25T09:34:00.000-04:00

But for eternity,
I gave up a lifetime,
An even exchange,
Your life for mine,
I will walk away from it all,
Because You give me everything.

I can never full explain why you gave so much and took my pain,
As ungrateful and selfish as I can be,
You never stopped loving me,
You swept me off my feet,
You took away my guilt and shame,
And no matter how far I go I hear You calling my name.

Lord everyday is a new day,
But Your love remains the same,
Embrace me, Redeem me,
Because only Your love can save me
Change me, Free Me,
Your love is calling out for me.

But for eternity,
I gave up a lifetime,
An even exchange,
Your life for mine,
I will walk away from it all,
Because You give me everything.
Lisa McClendon, Live from the House of Blues

Lord, I praise You, because you love me unconditionally of what I do, think, or say. You never have taken this gift away! And I just can't explain why You love me so much, but You do, and I'm thankful. As long as I live, my desire is to serve You, make Your name known amongst men, and see Your will done. You are worthy to be praised!

Mark 8:36

2006-09-19T15:30:00.000-04:00

"What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? "

Now you can't tell me that evangelism is not important, regardless of where, or who's toes you steppin on.... ponder that! When it comes down to it, souls are at stake, and people are dying.

It Upsets Me When..... Call Me 116

2006-09-19T01:05:00.000-04:00

Matthew 28:18-20, The Great Commission
Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in[a] the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

I don't understand when people have the key to life in their hands and don't want to share with anyone the Answer. It just doesn't make any sense to me. How can you be Christian and not care about the people around you. It's the true test.

Criticize people who want to share their faith as you will, but what you need to evaluate is, "what are you really doing?" The Bible says, "If anyone is ashamed of me and my words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of him when he comes in his glory and in the glory of the Father and of the holy angels."

Well, "I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile." -Romans 1:16

Matthew 5:13-16
"You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men." You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.

Looking Forward To...

2006-09-17T11:25:00.000-04:00

What I'm most looking forward to is...

IMPACT 2006. You better go register! We're going to ATL this Decemeber. Everyone can go. Speakers like Keith Battle, Priscilla Shirer, and Charles Gilmer, you can't miss it. Plus dynamic praise and worship by Isreal New Breed, Michelle Bonilla, and Cross Movement. You can't convince me that you won't be blessed in the fellowship of believers. Don't let money stop you... come talk to me, if you want to find out more about it! We're trying to arrange transportation, so don't let that be a factor either. Get Hype! Get Hype!

www.impactmovement.com for more information and to register.

Parents Weekend. The Black Voices Concert and Impact. The '06/'05 throwback of Alumni!

Small Groups. I'm excited to see how God is going to move. And I'm ready to go out and sharemy faith with the group.

And the Reunion with the Summer Project: ONE South Africa at the National Conference. Man I love 'em. Stepping our hearts out for Christ. I'm excited.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's me.

Comfortable and Safe? I think not!

2006-09-16T22:29:00.000-04:00

Well last Saturday... a black organization was throwing a party. In a series of events, my roommate, Tomi, and I felt like God was pulling on our hearts to go to the party. We joked around about taking our bibles to the party and evangelizing. We played around with it for about 10 minutes, and the burden just felt heavier. So we prayed about it and asked God for wisdom to know exactly what to do. We just knew it was funny, because she's the Choir President, and I'm Impact President; people would just look at us funny and ask "why are they here?"

So we got dressed, got some passages/spirit-filled booklets, and our bibles, then off to the party. I grabbed a member of the leadership team to take her with us, to get some more experience. So we get there, and people are just wondering and already speculating about why we were there.

NOW let me tell you my motivation for not backing down. A staff memeber from South Africa, Rose Thompson, had told me a story about sharing her faith at house parties. They would find parties, knock on doors, and ask for 5 or so minutes from the host. They would then present the Gospel and share thier faith. I've carried that story in the back of my head, praying to grow in my boldness of sharing my faith.

Ok, back to the story... well we decided that the best way to share our faith, after many moments of contemplation, was to walk in front of the venue, and just ask people for a couple of minutes. We prayed for wisdom and then went on.

It was about 1 AM in the morning, and 1 girl got saved, and many heard a clear presentation of the Gosel. It was the most amazing experience. Imagine being outside of a party, a couple of people sharing their faith on the street, and people crying outside the party having found the Answer and a Savior. It was amazing, and really put things in perspective.

This is where I learned that it's not about being comfortable, its not about the status quo, and the only thing that matter is Christ. It's true, only the things we do for the Kingdom will last!

I'm just really learning what it means to serve in ministry and really really seek His face. AMAZING! And I'm having such a good time. So I'm just really looking forward to what the Lord has in the future! And even post graduation!

Up and Poppin

2006-09-16T11:01:00.000-04:00

The last couple of days has been a struggle. I've been battling sickness and just getting over a cold, or whatever it may have been. I'm really having a ball doing this whole President thing, and God has just been teaching me sooooo much. Sometimes, it feels like too much at one time, but I'm really just taking it a day at a time letting it soak for easy digestion.

To see the growth of the team has been amazing. For them to realize that they are the CORE of this ministry has been awesome. What is discipleship? It's gotta be the core of our ministry, to raise up the next generation. I love it!

Week one, we had Pastor James Taylor speak at Impact. O man, he ripped it to smithereens, and then put it down to sleep. It was over! This week we had Pastor Korey Grice.... amazing. Great man of God who is just dedicated to sharing his wisdom. I like that.

Well both weeks, we've just been trying to get small groups off the ground, but the mere fact that our speakers hit on the small group nail everytime, is confirmation! It's confirmation.

I've been chatting with the students from Western Cape, and God has just really built a family. Indeed, one body in Christ, and I can't wait to return to South Africa.

Well a brief summary of the past two weeks, I have a story to share, but it can wait.

In the mean time, let God us you!

It's Been A Minute.

2006-08-27T16:27:00.000-04:00

So I have conquered my first un-full week of school. It feels like I've been in school since last August. But man, what a blessing it has been to see all that I've seen in the last couple of days.

I keep saying, I never thought that I would miss South Africa as much as I do. From my ONE South Africa team to the different Ministries we worked alongside, I more than miss it! Talking with past alumni from the project like Jake, Taylor, and Amey, have made it worth it. There's nothing like talking to someone who's been where you've been, they simply, understand.

Being back at school, we've done a Leadership Potluck and Bring 'Em Out. This would be IMPACT's program to help African-American, and other students move into thier new dorms, which gives them familiar faces to look to if and when they need help.

And then the retreat. On or about Sunday, there was a bit of lethargy/tiredness about to set in, and school hadn't even started yet. Amey came to talk to us at the retreat, both Sunday and Monday. WOW... talk about 'it will bless your life.' Had an amazing time in Louisa. OOO, and I got to do a little talk on follow-up, lost notes and all! But look at God, it went well.

Activities fair is done, it was a hit. We collected contact cards, passed out First-Year Survival Kits... and let me tell you, the stuff in those FSK's were amazing. From DVD's to music.

And then follow-up on Wed, Thurs, and Fri.

So we've been running with IMPACT for the last week or so, and to see the Leadership Team so bout it, is more than a blessing. Because indeed they are the core of our leadership team! I' enjoying waiting on God, and learning that apart from Him nothing can happen.

I tell you, I'm amazied everyday about God and His goodness. I really can't explain it, but I'm looking forward to the future.

In Him,
Charlene

Back in the Stated

2006-08-05T06:27:00.000-04:00

I don't think there are any words to completely explain what God did this summer. It's amazing to see the amount of love in the South African culture, and how even despite differences, we are indeed a family.

Even a midst my roomates and housemates God did a wonder. At the end of the trip, though I've known them only about a months, I consider them family. O what a great joy it is to share in the body of Christ.

Having been back, I've grown alot. Being able to look back at the experience, I feel as though this was the first time that I had felt God tug on my heart towards missions. I never thought I could be a missionary before, but everyday God shows us something new, that we had never imagined.

Even in our small group settings, I learned things that I didn't know and somethings I had never even pondered to ask. My small group was absolutely amazing... the Ladies of Room 4 are AMAZING. And I truly appreciate them.

I think the University of Western Cape was my favorite place because I found people that I could relate to, people that were just like me, people that were my age. We could talk about anything, but above all I knew that they were bout it about seeing the gosepl reach every nation, every person. They take great passion in what they do, knowing that it is only by the power of the Holy Spirit that God draws men to Him. Having just a week on campus made it sad. We bonded so well with the students at the University of Western Cape. Truly brothers and sisters, a God ordained friendship.

The times when we we were on campus, I truly cherished. The picture to the left shows a majority of the ONE Team stepping in the outside common area of the University. We stepped to John 3:16... absolutely stunning, who knew it was possible?

I would be lying through my teeth if I denied how my heart yearns to return to South Africa. From Holiday Club, Prison Ministry, Hospital Ministry, Painting Murals, to Campus Ministry, I had the time of my life. We did mass evangelism and door-to-door evangelism, any kind of ministry that you can ponder, we did that this summer. It's amazing how God worked that out.

It's amazing to see how God draws people unto Him. The stories and memories that I have will last a lifetime. I pray that the instances of growth and being stretched, I will mantain in my heart to never forget. When things look like they are getting rough, God has ultimately proven Himself to be a steadfast God, the same yesterday, today, and forevermore. May I not lean unto my own understanding but TRUST in the word of God and the expereinces I've had, because He has already said it, and His WORD will not return void.

I'm a sucker when it comes to great stories, and for me this is a love story. Another chapter in unveiling a part of God's character and His beauty. Truly truly truly he is the beggining and the end. And I've fallen in love again, amazed of how great He is.

For my team, they taught me alot. I'm grateful for the staff memebers that attended the trip because they were committed to our growth, that means alot to me, that someone would donate thier efforts and their time to equip us. They challenged us on every side. I learned a lot about myself and about serving in ministry amongst awesome men and women of God, and for that I'm thankful. My heart is with all of you, and I will continue to hold you down. I praise God for friendships, but above that, I praise God for family, because that's what you are to me.

Changed Forever,
Charlene

To Explain the Situation.....

2006-07-23T14:47:00.000-04:00

Hey haven't had internet access in a while, for about a week and a half, and just wanted to update eceryone on how things have been going. ... "they are going well!" Hahaha, I promise, I'll put up a blog in the next couple of days!

See ya August 3....

Ultimately In Control, Ultimately Sovereign, Utlimately Good

2006-07-12T14:32:00.000-04:00

Lately God has been teaching us all of his goodness, and that He is ultimately Sovereign! This means a lot considering all the poverty we are seeing. Sometimes its discouraging, and it makes us not want to have to endure the sight of people suffering. More than ever, the one thing I'[m learning is that God is Sovereign, and has planned everything out before we could even think of it, and that everything he does is for a reason.

When it comes to lessons, I'm learning that I can do NOTHING in my own power. It is only in the power of God that things can be completed. It is in my weakness that His strength is perfected! I'm having to relinquish everything that I do to Him, and for someone who is usually delegating, it has been the task of now, but a lesson for forever.

Its about 12:30 in the Afternoon

2006-07-12T06:31:00.000-04:00

Well it's 6am American time, and Noon South African time. I find myself at home because I'm sick. So a little bed rest and a little bit of time with Jesus, and things will get better. There seems to be something going around, because most of us can't seem to hold our food, you eat and it seems to go right through you. So at this point, we're just praying that God would divinely intervene in whatever it is. I just wanted to get you guys updated.

We've been holding a holiday club, which is the equivalent of an American Vacation Bible School. It's been one of the greatest experiences. One the kids see the IMPACT truck on the street they start running for the holiday club site. I've never seen kids that excited and chasing after us to come and get a taste of Jesus for the day. We are doing this in conjuction with a group called Africa Jam! They are amazing, high energy, vocalists, entertainers, and young men and women who desire for the gospel to reach all.

Jesemiel and I are co-leading a small group of children. Now what we never aanticipated is how much American culture impacts other countries. They wanted a name, but something that signifies the hip=hop culture. They were calling out things likt 2Pacs gang, or 3-6Mafia, and then G-Unit. Well we wanted to appease them. So we started thinking, how can we take something they like, and use it to take the gospel to the rest, how can we make an Impact on these kids individually? G-UNIT!!!!! Yes, we found it. When the team leaders, Jesimiel and I say G-UNIT! They say GOD's UNIT!!! This is something that will always play through their minds when they say G-UNIT!!! Yeah, mission accomplished. We came up with ways to rep, and the kids did a south African dance called cut the cake.... This joint is amazing

That's it for now....
For those of you desiring to see pictures, please refer to my facebook page, or Jesemiel's passbook page.

ONE South Africa! One body, New Perspective, and Eternal Life

Pictures from Evangelism Events

2006-07-09T07:45:00.000-04:00

Me teaching the bible story about the two thieves and how Jesus Christ forgave one because the thief believed that he was truly the Son of the living God.

Juvenile Detention Center, 60 Kids awaiting trial from charges of murder, rape, to stealing, accepted Christ.

Day 1, 2, and 3 in South Africa

2006-07-06T13:45:00.000-04:00

Hey Everyone. Greetings from South Africa. Thus far it has been the most amazing trip of my life.

DAY 1: Briefing and Preperation
As of July 3, I disappeared. I hadn't left the country, just gone into briefing mode. We spent the night in a hotel near Dulles. We did group bonding excercises, learned a little about what we were going to do, and spend some time in prayer.

At about 10 pm or so we were dismissed to do last minute packing and just socialize. But having been up so early, we were so tired. Around 11:30 or so Jesemiel wanted to find a place to split his belongings because his baggage was overweight. We wanted to suprise Jesimiel for his birthday, but he wanted to watch t.v. with us. So we made him leave, and acted like we were going to bed.

At the end of the night, we had no cake, no candles, and 4 bucks. We went down to the convenient store in the hotel and bought a bucket of cookie dough ice cream, went to his room and sang happy birthday really loud. Hotel security rushed up and sent us back to our rooms. But hey... we had fellowship and bonding time.

Day 2: All Day Plane Ride
The plane ride was a little over 20 hours. We took off from Washington Dulles International on South African Airways. We had a stopover in Dakar Senegal. Mind you, just to get to Dakar was a 91/2 hour flight. At the end of hour 3, was not a little bored, I was more than bored and tired at the same time. We sat on the plane for a little over an hour getting refueld and the changing of crews. Knowing our team, we were going to take advantage of every opportunity to make some noise. So at the stop, we played Around the World and the "if you could bring two things on a trip, what would it be" game that Jesimiel made up.

We watched the Pink Panther movie, which was absolutely hilarious. It's a must see!

Then another plane to Johannesburg, South Africa. Then we had to go through customs and recheck our baggage. A couple of airport porters helped us get our things together and teach us a bit of Zulu. "Son dote, ujama?" I can't really rememebr if that's right, but it means, "How are you?"

From then on a 2 hour flight to Cape Town, our final destination. By this time, everyone was ready to get off the plane. It had been the longest flight EVER! Everyones feet were swollen, people were hitting the walls, (i.e. at thier wits end).

FINALLY We reached Cape Town. It was soooo cold! Winter time, to the point where I wished I had more than a sweat shirt and gloves. When you get to South Africa, you expect to taste the heat of Africa, the true almost Saharn climate. Ignorantly, I ignored the advice of staff, thinking that I'm not a very cold person. At night the temperature drops to about 20/30 degrees. I sleep in sweat pants, two pairs of socks, gloves and a sweatshirt. Its crazy... who woulda thought that the climate would be so anti-african paradigmish.

It's been such a growing expereinece. Already there are certain sacrifices we've had to make.

Soon after, we made it to the guest house, which was absolutely beautiful. My roommates are Tiffany(UConn), Julie(U of Miami), and Sardee (Howard). There all amazing people. We each are different with different personalities. Tiffany is the cool, calm, and collective one. Julie, is the highly energetic and excited about everything. Sardee is the thinker. And I, I'm just me, loud, funny, and always hyper. At the airport, Britanne and Knetta dared me that I wouldn't speak for 10 WHOLE MINUTES! Well let's just say I love bets.

Today was an action packed day. We went to bed at like 1 pm, and woke up at like 7:30p.

The Day After Tomorrow

2006-06-30T20:58:00.000-04:00

Well, the day after tomorrow, I'll no longer be in the continent of America.

South Africa here we come!

Political, Social, and Religious history all under one umbrella, South Africa. From the Aids Epidemic to Apartheid, this trip seems life changing. Though my family travels abroad to Ghana almost every year, Southern Africa, is a place that I'm only familiar with because of videos/movies, what I've heard and the news.

People like Nelson Mandela and the famous Robben Island where he was imprisoned are just a few of the historical places we will visit during our journey.

I'm really excited to see the kinds of things that God is going to do on this missions trip. Not only is it a learning experience but we will get to see the power of God manifested first hand. This is one of those trip that you don't leave 'changed,' because change is not permanent and takes years, rather you leave TRANSFORMED! Because that is just how God works.

The purpose of our trip is to allow God to work in our lives through the personal enrichment that comes from this type of Impact Summer Project and Missions trip. Second, we will be with other college students around the nation ministering in Cape Town, South Africa and Khayelitscha, a black township. And third, we will be volunteering in an AIDs orphanage, Beautiful Gate Ministries (pictured to the right).

"When Hitler attacked the Jews I was not a Jew, therefore, I was not concerned. And when Hitler attacked the Catholics, I was not a Catholic, and therefore, I was not concerned. And when Hitler attacked the unions and the industrialists, I was not a member of the unions and I was not concerned. Then, Hitler attacked me and the Protestant church - and there was nobody left to be concerned."
-Martin Niemeller, "Congressional Record", 1968

While reading, I found this quote and it amazed me how we brush off things because they don't affect us. It testifies to the face that when we ignore problems because they don't directly affect us, sooner or later, it catches up. Instead of standing by and feeling sorry for a nation, why not HELP, why not share the life changing GOSPEL with someone who is hurting. Who else can heal hearts, mend broken hearts, and give you eternal life?

This trip is going to be more than amazing. It seems as though the devil has tried to do everything to stop this group from coming together to bear witness to Christ's name in the Republic of South Africa. There are testimonies upon testimonies of how things didn't look like they were going to work out, but GOD IS FAITHFUL.

I will try my best to post pictures and prayer requests of the project. To all my ministry supporters and partners, THANK YOU! For those who have given financially, prayed for the project, or even offered words of wisdom and encouragement, I thank you, and pray that God bless you exceedingly, abundantly above all that you have given to me and sowed into this ministry.

...only the things that we do for Christ will last!

Getting Ready for South Africa!

2006-06-22T21:02:00.000-04:00

IMPACT SUMMER PROJECT 2006: ONE SOUTH AFRICA

One Body
New Perspective
Everlasting Life

So I'm currently in preparation to go to South Africa for the month of July. July 3rd to August 3rd. I'm so excited. So many things have tried to stop me from going on this trip. Court dates, money, applications, other stuff, that I know that God has planned GREAT things in South Africa.

We will be working and ministering in black townships, volunteering in an AIDs Orphanage, and working closely with the students at the University of Cape Town. Geez, I can't wait. Practical discipleship and evangelism at its finest!

Introducing the 2006 ONE Team... I love 'em!

I'll try to keep you guys updated on our progress in South Africa as the time and opportunities allow. They may not be long entries, but something to show you how God is manifesting himself in South Africa. I'll also try to put up prayer requests and praise reports as they arise. So keep updated!!! And to all those ministry supporters, thank you for sowing a seed into this ministry.

Learning to Adapt

2006-06-21T13:17:00.000-04:00

Learning to Adapt!

Joseph had a dream that he was going to be large and in charge. He had a dream that God was going to give him an uncanny thing that nobody in his family had. He had a dream that he was going to do great exploits for God that nobody in his family had ever seen. Whenever you are anointed by God, it will seem strange and foreign, because nobody in your family has what you are about to receive. As a matter of fact, your own family will be your first line of attack; they're so used to being cookie cutter and middle of the road, and don't know how to handle a dreamer. But praise God for some Joseph's who say they don't want a mediocre blessing, they ask God to do something unique in their lives.

He had a dream, and his family threw him in a pit. But he learned how to adapt and adjust in the pit. He adapted in the pit because he said "this don't look like my promise. I’m in here but this is not what God told me I was going to be." If you’re in a pit experience say “this does not match my promise.” When you get in that hooptie and you know God has greater things in store for you. There’s no reason for you to be depressed, just drive it, keep it clean, vacuum it out, take the clothes out of the trunk. Pick up the McDonalds fries off the back seat, and say “this is just temporary, but I gotta guard it while it’s mine.”

He’s thrown in t he pit, and after that he’s thrown in the prison. When he’s thrown in the prison, he has got to adapt again. You know he’s adapted, because many of us when we are in bondage, we get bitter. But you’ll notice that when Joseph is in prison, he makes friends. You’ll know that you have an adaptive mentality and attitude when you can be nice to people when you don’t like where you are. But aren’t you glad that trouble don’t’ last always. You gotta psych yourself out, saying “where you are you not gonna be there long,”

You need to tell all your haters, “I may not drive like you, dress like you, or have the money that you got, but I thank God that I’m paid for. I’ve been bought with a price. And the Lord told me that I don’t need clothes to be the bomb, money to signify who I am, and I don’t need a title to have authority, but every morning that I wake up, I adapt to my environment!

He gets into the palace and he doesn’t have to adapt. When you get into your rightful place, you don’t need orientation. When you get into the area where God needs you to be, you don’t need to read a handbook. That’s why when you get into God’s house; you don’t need anyone to show you how to worship, because that is where you belong.

Jesus learned how to adapt. Jesus is the Greatest Adapter, because He knows that He is the King. Not only the King of Righteousness, and the King of Justice, but the King of ALL. That is why the adversaries could not deter Him. They put a crown of thorns on his head trying to make fun of him. But Jesus said keep it on me, because if I’m gonna wear this crown, I want you to understand that this crown is getting ready to be traded in for something else. When people attack you, they are just setting you up for the next blow up!

Where you are is not where you are going to stay. But if you are going to be there for a season, you might as well adapt until God elevates you to the next level. Your call to adapt is to take in the environment without the environment taking you. The Christ in me and you is stronger than your circumstance.

My challenge for you today is to learn to adapt!

God is Testing your Faith

2006-06-21T12:20:00.000-04:00

Like Abraham, God is testing our faith at times. Abraham exercised faith before he reached the point of being tried. He's all these things to us.....

Master

Savior

Ruler

Redeemer

Shelter

Provider

Deliverer

Healer

Father

Jesus

"I gave up a lifetime for eternity"

How amazing is that? Eternity, whoa! God continues to show me more of who he is everyday. everyday he continues to show me more of who he is, more characteristics. The above to name a few. I have a testimony... Well, I have a lot of testimonies, but to share one: raising support to go to South Africa, has been such a faith walk. Trusting and believing that God is going to make a way, has been rough but at the same time, shows me that God is able to do exceedingly, abundantly, and above all that I could ask for.

With less than 2 weeks, about 10 days left to go to South Africa, I had not even raised half the money. I needed about $2,400, and I needed God to do something. I guess I needed to put my dream to rest, even though I knew that God had called me to do this. Physically, it didn't look like I was going. And I became disappointed and a little depressed.

Well with over 80 letters for support sent out, follow ups, and no responses, I felt like I had exhausted all my resource's. But, God will surpass you! I fasted for about a week and started seeking God. My perspective changed, and all of a sudden, during the fast, a teacher gave $500. I had to take a praise break! And just over the last week, God has been faithful, people that I never thought would give, are calling and asking how they can contribute. People that said they will give are giving more than promised. God is amazing!

Look at what God can do when we take him out of the box. There is nothing too hard for God. I dare you to not get upset and depressed, I dare you to challenge God to meet your need. God is able to meet your needs according to his riches and Glory. When we read that verse, many times we neglect that needs is plural! He can do whatever you need him to do and then some!

Everyday...

2006-06-19T21:22:00.000-04:00

In the past couple of days, God has really just been bringing me back. It's been a couple of weeks, I think I got to the point where I was just going through routine. Which is horrible, I do admit. And that's what it came to for me, being able to admit that I've fallen short, and I continue to fall short. The key was being able to say God, "I give it all to You, for without Him I am nothing!" I heard this guy say "My Worship Is My Lifestyle?" Whoa, It blew my mind! You hear it all the time, but sincerely, its life changing.

"You are the Joy of My Desire"- Lisa McClendon, Live at the House of Blues
"Joy of my desire! All consuming fire, Lord of Glory, Rose of Sharon, so Great and Sweet. You are now my Peace. Comforter and Friend, Wonderful, So Beautiful You are to me! I worship You in spirit and in truth! Lord, I worship you in spirit and in truth. There will never be a friend as dear and as close to me as You."

Maybe sometimes we underestimate the goodness and GRACE of God. Sometimes we neglect it after we've been doing our thing for a while that it is only because of Grace that we are still standing. Its like denying the power of the blood, it makes a relationship into a religion. And many don't understand that. If you don't acknowledge the blood, then what do you have left. It is because of the BLOOD that we are redeemed, washed, and set apart.

I'm falling in love again, and I love it. I love not knowing what the next step is, the fact that I can just lean on Him. It's a relationship that requires trust. And I tell you that He has never failed me yet. Have you ever danced with someone, and just felt safe in their arms, felt like you were dancing on a cloud? It's like being engulfed to the point where it's just me and Him. And I love it!

My God, I don't know what I've gotten myself into, but when I think of my decision to take heed to the calling of God, and follow Him, I have no regrets, none at all.

Well I gotta run, work tomorrow calls my name....

When Your Faith Needs Strengthening...

2006-06-09T20:33:00.000-04:00

Yo Yo Yo... lol. You know sometimes, it doesn't matter how long you've been doin the walk. Sometimes, your faith needs a little strengthening. I got to the point where I was crying all the time, and all I needed was someone to talk to, someone to pray with and for me, because I couldn't even pray for myself. Last night was the night. Maybe I've been like this for the last week or so.

But I praise God for putting so many wonderful people around me. Sometimes its the person you'd least expect to help you move beyond your barriers and obstacles in life. (So thank you for being there.) It's at the times when you can't express yourself that your brothers and sisters in Christ come and speak life into you! It's amazing. As the body of Christ, we are God's hands and feet, and it is our job to make sure the rest of the body is functioning...

Psalm 77 says:
7"Will the Lord cast off for ever? And will He be favorable no more?
8Is His mercy clean gone for ever? Doth His promise fail for evermore?
9Hath God forgotten to be gracious? Hath He in anger shut up His tender mercies?" Selah
10And I said, "This is my infirmity, but I will remember the years of the right hand of the Most High."
11I will remember the works of the LORD; surely I will remember Thy wonders of old. Over the past two year, I've met so many wonderful people, and it's crazy how God sets things up.

During the times when we feel like there's nothing going for us, I think we shoud remember God's love and grace for us. The Bible says His mercy endureth forever!

I may not know what I want to do with the rest off my life, but what I do know is that God is truly awesome, and I'm willing to give everything up to follow Him wherever he may take me.

I know I was off on a far tangent on this one, but there's a testimony here. Sometimes we just have to wait on God in expectancy of what He's going to do. As the time for South Africa, I'll share what I really mean. But for now, Trust God and lean not on your own understanding, because it just won't make sense. But trust me on this one, God will suprise you, if you let Him do Him!

Identity and Dismay

2006-06-08T09:54:00.000-04:00

The more I feel like I step into my calling, the more I lose my identity. I guess that's the point, huh? To forget who you are and take on the mind of Christ.

It is somehow unsettling to feel your life slipping through the cracks of your hand. What do I do. Absolutely Nothing. Let God be God? Well ofcourse. In this stage of my life, God is moving some things around, I can only hope and pray to find rest in it.

Much Love and In His Service,
Char B.

Yeah I Blog, That's Me...

2006-06-06T20:11:00.001-04:00

Yeah I blog, that's me. I been looking for something to do with my time, that's me. I love to write, I love to learn; yeah, that's me! It is really crazy sometimes what we can teach ourselves to do over the course of a summer. Now that makes everything worthwhile!

A little about me: Well there ain't much to say. I mean, I have a lot to say. I talk alot, yeah that's me! I love living and have dedicated my life to see the Gospel spread across language barriers, watter barrieres, and across this world. We are in dire need of it. I guess this tells you alot about who I am, I am a woman of faith, yeah, that's me. I believe in the Trinity. I believe in the life transforming power of Jesus Chrsit, and I believe that God has the power to do anything.

Well, I'm preparing to go to South Africa with the IMPACT Movement this summer, and am more than excited! Can't wait to see my team, evangelize on that campus, and invest time in those kids at the AIDS orphanage.